I stopped in the school office Monday to unabashedly brag about how On Top Of Things I am this year. I've revamped my organizing system (to basically this one) and so far, I'm keeping up with the flood of school-related paperwork.
Seriously? I should teach a class for new parents on how to organize dates and papers. I'm THAT GOOD.
So way back when Shout was a newborn, (just go with me here for a sec) we contemplated the expensive medical road ahead and came to the conclusion that I might need to get a job simply for better health insurance. I looked at the skill set I had left after being home for 5 years and realized the only thing I was good at was slinging hash. (And by "hash," I mean FOOD, not hashish. Although I would probably sling either one if it got me a decent PPO.)
I decided I would be a good cafeteria lady. I'm used to cooking mediocre food for a crowd, I'm a little surly, and I wear orthopedic shoes.
Fortunately, the most expensive aspects of Shout's care have yet to hit us (if you can believe that), so I never had to go out and get that cafeteria lady job, but I've been holding it close to my heart.
This year, with everyone in school finally, I volunteered to help out on Pizza Day. Finally, my Cafeteria Lady aspirations come to fruition! One thing I am REALLY good at is passing out pizza from a box. If they gave out PhD's for that, I would have one. Summa cum laude.
My middle schoolers would be SO EXCITED to see me standing behind the counter with their pizza in hand.
"HI SWEEEEEEEEEETIE!!!!!!"
I even bought a hair net because I think the kids would LOVE that. And a Kiss the Cook apron. And little pizza slice dangly earrings.
Ooooh, I could hardly wait for Pizza Day this past Tuesday. I reminded them about 40 times that morning.
"I'LL SEE YOU AT LUNCH TIME!!!!"
Alas, about 15 minutes after I dropped them off, the school called. Pizza Day doesn't actually start until next week. (Something the Hairnet/Pizza Lady/Teacher of New Parent Organizing Classes should know, right?)
Sadly, I had to pack 4 lunches and drive them up to school. No hairnet. No apron. No earrings.
I can't WAIT for next week.
You know, most organizing systems come with a calendar so you can keep track of these kinds of things. Just saying'...
ReplyDeleteC'mon, you TOTALLY could have worn the hair net to drop off the lunches! Like a trial run!
ReplyDeleteRolling on the floor laughing. Awesome.
ReplyDeleteI've often wondered if being a cafeteria lady would be a good gig. I know one, I should ask her.
After your intro paragraph, I thought you were going to say that you had gotten a job at the school because of your superior organizational skills.
Sue, this is all going to make a great book someday - particularly with the way you tell the stories!
ReplyDeleteFrank, I'm officially making you president of my fan club. And yes, the calendar was my downfall.
ReplyDeleteCalendars are for the weak. They ruin all the spontaneity and fun out of life. And make for boring stories. "Remember that time the calendar reminded me to pick up the kids from school? Hil-air-EE-us!"
ReplyDeleteI just want to know where you found the pizza slice earrings. I totally want to embarrass my kids (or my wife, I can't decide).